Her Denial

By: Jennica Williams

DISCLAIMER: I am not using Star Trek for profit. Paramount owns the characters, the ships, the uniforms, the biogel packs, even Neelix's food, I'm just here playing around with the ideas running through my head. No copyright infringement is intended.

"You should have seen your face when that child asked if we were married!" Chakotay grinned as they made their way back to their quarters.

"Remind me to thank B'Elanna for adding that town into the program." She retaliated with a wry smile.

"Oh come on, you know you loved the program" The two stepped into the turbolift together.

"Deck three." Janeway told the computer without thinking. Then she turned on her first officer. "So what if I did?"

"Knew it." He couldn't help but grin at her. She was standing, hands on hips, head tilted slightly to the side, a drop of water about to drip off her chin, and eyes looking up at him with laughter sparkling through them. He consciencly pushed all thoughts of grabbing her in a bear hug and kissing her breathless out of his mind. "I knew you couldn't resist me tonight, Kat."

She smiled at the nickname, "Who said it was you I wanted?" she retorted playfully. "Maybe I wanted a fun evening. Look at what my choices were. Data padds or a holodeck adventure which I had no idea about and someone refused to tell me anything about."

"Someone who must have done a good job picking out the program though since I know you enjoyed the downpour."

She looked down at their soaked uniforms. "I could have used a little warning."

"What?" Chakotay faked astonishment. "And miss seeing your eyes grow huge when that cloud started to drop buckets of rain on us?"

The 'lift doors opened and Chakotay was in the corridor before she could make a reply. He reached her door several steps ahead of her and quickly keyed his over ride code into the keypad.

"Emergencies only." She reminded him as she slipped past him.

"This is an emergency." He protested following her. "I'm freezing cold and need some hot coffee."

Kathryn gave a very un-captain-like roll of her eyes as she ducked in her room to change. When she came back, Chakotay had settled himself on her couch with two cups of coffee.

"Thanks." She said gratefully accepting the steaming mug he held out to her. "And thanks for dragging me away from the padds tonight. I really did enjoy it."

He smiled at her. "I knew you would. B'Elanna showed me the program last week, I knew you'd find those rock climbs a challenge. Just didn't realize I'd find them as much of a challenge too." His eyes twinkled on the last sentence.

"Are you insulting my climbing expertise?" she raised her eyebrows as she took a sip of the dark liquid.

"Well, men are naturally stronger." Wrong thing to say. Chakotay watched as her eyes narrowed at him.

"Care to make a friendly wager on that, commander?"

"Sure. Holodeck 2. Tomorrow at 2000 hours. We'll do the advanced level of the program."

"I'll reserve the holodeck."

"Already done."

Her eyes flew to his. "A little presumptuous are we?"

"I had a feeling you'd want to try the program again." He flashed her that easy going smile that made Janeway's heart melt. Before she could let her thoughts run wild he brought her back. "I need to get out of these wet clothes. I'm going to head back to my quarters."

She stood with him. "Of course. I'll see you tomorrow then."

They walked to the door, before he got close enough for it to open, Chakotay reached over and pulled Kathryn into a hug. She instantly stiffened and pulled away.

"Kat..." he whispered holding onto her elbows as he searched her eyes.

"No Chakotay." She stated quiet, but firmly as she pushed on his chest. "You know I can't get in a relationship right now."

He looked at her for a long second. "Can't or won't?" She barely could hear the words, and then he was gone.

"Both." She whispered after him.

B'Elanna Torres was nearly ran over Ensign Wilner as she rushed to Holodeck 2. "Sorry Andrea!" she called over her shoulder rounding the next corner.

Andrea watched the chief engineer dash off. 'Another meeting with Lt. Paris' she guessed. She was right.

B'Elanna was twenty minutes late due to a last minute problem with the plasma relay systems. She had finally located the enigma and left it in Seven's hands to fix, after making a mental note to check up on her later. She still didn't quite trust the former Borg after the 8472 had been beamed onto the Hirogen vessel. But right now was not the time to worry about a lost 8472, Tom was in the Sandrines program waiting for her.

She entered the program and quickly scanned the room. Harry was playing a game of pool with Lt. Cailryas and Ensigns Jefferson and Trurners. But where was Tom? There. Over in the shadows. In a remote corner of the holodeck that was half in the shadows sat Tom Paris and Lt. Amanda Geirson. B'Elanna watched as Amanda laughed at something Tom said and rested her hand on his. When he did nothing to mover her hand, her half-Klingon temper began to flare up.

With angry strides, she reached their table in barely a few seconds. "Tom." She said in a low growl behind him.

He jumped and stood quickly. "B'Ela." His smiled turned soft instantly for her. He moved as if to kiss her, but caught sight of the angry look in her eyes. "What's wrong?"

She didn't say anything, but glared at Amanda.

"Umm, excuse us." Tom took B'Elanna by the elbow and pulled her away. "What is wrong with you B'Ela?" he asked bewildered.

"Just how close are you and Amanda?" she demanded to know.

His eyes nearly fell out of his head. "Amanda?!?" He nearly laughed, but at the serious look on her face, he stopped. "Honest, B'Ela. She's nothing more than a friend."

"You sit in dark, secluded areas of the holodeck and let all of your friends touch your hands like that?" she ignored his gaping mouth and continued her rant. "Tom Paris, you must think I'm and idiot to believe something like that. And I must have been because I actually thought you would be faithful to our relationship. I'm just glad I found out before it was too late. We're over helmboy." With that, she spun on her heel and left Tom staring after her too dazed to realize what had happened.

He stood there for a few minutes still in shock. B'Elanna had gotten angry. B'Elanna had gotten very angry. B'Elanna had decided that they weren't together anymore. Tom felt anger begin to boil in his veins. She had read into it all wrong. There was nothing wrong with sitting with a friend and talking. Amanda had put her hand on his, but that could hardly be called flirting, she had been pointing out pressure points on the hands and fingers that could be used for finding a pulse. Tom stalked out of the holodeck in a mad fit of anger. Taking the turbolift to deck 3 he exited in a blind rage, he needed to get to his quarters, and the quicker the better. Not even seeing the captain standing in the middle of the corridor, he nearly ran her over before stopping.

"Sorry." He muttered, then noticed her. Janeway had been standing, but not going anywhere. Simply staring down the hall as though waiting for something. Her hair, usually dry, was wet and curling at the ends to form ringlets which were dripping water onto her uniform.

"Captain? Are you ok?"

She turned to him. "I'm fine. Just thinking." She noticed the angry fire in his blue eyes, not directed at her, but at someone else. "Are you ok, Tom?"

He nodded his head quickly, then sighed.

"Want to talk about it?" she offered.

He pondered the thought for a moment. Captain Janeway was a woman, perhaps she could shed some light on what B'Elanna was thinking. "I guess I need to talk to someone." He mumbled.

"Come on in. Tea? Coffee?"

"No thanks." He sat down on the edge of her sofa. "B'Elanna just got really angry with me." He began. "I was in the holodeck with Lt. Geirson, we were sitting at a table, which B'Elanna called 'secluded and in a dark corner'. Amanda said something about an ensign she once knew trying to take a pulse from the patient's hand. We laughed at it, but she said that there really was a slight pulse. She touched my hand to show me where, and B'Elanna came over."

Janeway nodded encouraging him to continue.

"She didn't say anything to Amanda, just kinda growled at me. I knew she was upset about something, but didn't know what. I pulled her away, and she leapt on me about flirting with other women and saying that she couldn't believe she had trusted me to be faithful to our relationship." Tom's eyes began to fill with tears. No! He wouldn't cry here. Not in front of the captain. Angry at himself, he brushed them away with the back of his hand.

"Go ahead and cry." She said softly placing a hand on his arm. "Sometimes, we need to."

"She told me it was over." He whispered. "I've never been in love like I am with B'Elanna, Captain. She's the most wonderful woman I've ever met. I can't lose her." He looked at her. "What should I do?"

"Nothing." She said softly. At his confused look, she continued. "At least not for a few days. Give her time to cool off, but don't use this time to get reacquainted with other women. In a few days, meet her somewhere that you can talk privately for a while. Then, you need to explain everything to her. Give her a chance to see what this was about. It's not going to help if you get mad and don't explain anything to her."

He nodded, still brushing tears off his cheeks. He felt like a teenager talking to his mother about his first break up. Standing, he began to walk around.

"Thanks for listening to me and giving me advice, captain." He told her still trying to regain control of his tears. Then he began to run for the door.

"Tom," Janeway stopped him. "I know you want me to tell you everything is going to be ok, but I can't. B'Elanna has jumped to conclusions in this case, and you need to work them out. But my door is open if you need someone to talk to."

"Thanks, that means a lot to me." Tom smiled through his tears, he was already in the corridor, but seeing that he need a friend's touch, Janeway came out and gave him a hug.

Chakotay rounded the corner just in time to see Janeway step away from Paris and say something softly to him. Paris nodded and may have said something, Chakotay couldn't tell because the lieutenant's back was to him. Then Tom strolled down to his own quarters.

Janeway met Chakotay's eyes, and smiled. "Hello." She'd barely gotten the words out before Chakotay had grasped her hand and pulled her in her quarters.

"What was that out there??" he demanded.

Janeway stared at him for a minute. "What?" She finally asked.

"You hugging Paris." He folded his arms across his chest.

She followed the act, defensively. "He was upset. I talked to him, I hugged him. Nothing more than a friend comforting another."

"You'll hug him in the middle of the corridor, but won't hug me in our quarters?" Chakotay glared at her. "Does that make sense to you?"

"There are reasons I won't hug you Chakotay." Janeway stated. "Starting with how you would take it."

"And just how would I take it?"

"Romantically."

"So what if I did?" His eyes turned soft as he gazed down at her "One of these days you're going to have to face the fact that something's there, Kat. I just hope it's not the day one of us dies." He started to reach out and brush a stray lock of hair out of the way.

She swiped at his hand away angrily. "Who made you the expert on my feelings? So what if you can find a holoprogram I like. I think I should know myself a little better than you."

"Then you recognize how you feel?"

"Yes, I do. I'm growing angry at you, commander." She stated coldly. "I think it's time that you take yourself and any ideas you have about my feelings toward you, and get out."

"They're still there, Kathryn. I can see them in your eyes. Pushing them away solves nothing." Chakotay told her.

She glared at him, icy blue eyes piercing him. "I do not have, nor have there ever been, any romantic feelings toward you. I think it would be best if we saw less of each other, Commander. Consider our 'date' for tomorrow night canceled. And get out of my quarters."

Chakotay's mouth parted slightly in astonishment. He didn't know what to say, she'd never burst out at him like that. Dejectedly, he turned on his heel and walked out.

Kathryn unclenched her hands which were shaking as she made her way to her bed. She didn't even bother taking off her boots before throwing herself on it with a sob. Why did Chakotay have to keep pressing her? She was painfully aware of her feelings toward him, but a captain couldn't have a relationship with her first officer and still maintain the reputation she needed to. What hurt her the most were the words she had just spoken. Telling him that she had never had feelings for him had been one of the hardest things she'd done. It had hurt her drastically, but she was more concerned about his feelings. Maybe she should try to get him to fall out of love with her, then at least one of them wouldn't be hurting.

Chakotay sunk into a chair in his sitting room. She was lying. She had to be. Her eyes had been very guarded, as though she didn't want for him to see something. Yes, she must still love him. But then, why would she treat him like that? Protocol. The crew. Chakotay stood angrily. He loved her. She loved him. The crew would be happy for them. Protocol? They were sixty-eight years from home, somehow he didn't think Starfleet would have a problem with a marriage between the captain and first officer when they got back. After all, they could have children, grandchildren, even great-grandchildren by the time they got home, then what would Starfleet say? Nothing. (Well, they may wonder how the captain managed to squeezed four generations in one ship.)

Chakotay smiled for the first time in an hour. Then he remembered where they stood with each other right now, and the frown returned. He wandered over to his window to gaze at the stars. They were beautiful streaking by at warp speed. A tear began to form in his eye. If only Kathryn wouldn't push him away. But she was. The tears came. He didn't bother to wipe them away, instead he just crawled into bed and cried himself to sleep.

Over the next few days, the crew noticed a definite difference between the captain and commander. Every time Chakotay walked on the bridge, Janeway suddenly had pressing business somewhere else, usually her ready room.

Such was the case this morning. Janeway had been on the bridge at 0630, but when her XO had arrived at 0700, she had run to the safety of her ready room. She wasn't really doing much, reading over some padds, but not giving them her full attention. Her gaze drifted off the padd and over to her window. Stars were something she never got tired of watching. With a soft smile she remembered the first senior officer's on the Icarus. She had made a point of sitting with her back to the stars so she wouldn't be distracted. Of course, she smiled fully now, it had meant sitting right next to Justin.

*Beep*

"Come." She said absentmindedly.

The door opened to reveal Chakotay standing there. He stepped in, encouraged at her smile. When her eyes landed on him though, the smile was wiped off her face to be replaced with a cold frown.

"Can I help you commander?" she asked frostily.

He hesitated, "Here are the crew reports from astrometrics and the sciencelabs." He laid them on her desk.

"Thank you." When he didn't move away, she looked up at him. "Dismissed commander."

He still didn't move back to the bridge. She didn't look up at him afraid that he may see something in her eyes.

"I was wondering if you'd let me take you up on that challenge from a couple days ago." Chakotay finally said quietly. "I've got holodeck time tonight if you want to run the program."

"I have plans tonight, Commander. Tom is having a pool tournament."

"Oh. Another time then."

"I don't think you understand." Janeway stood up, even at her fullest height, she had to still look up at him. "When I said I thought it would be better for us to not see each other, I meant exactly that. Now, I'd appreciate it if you would return to the bridge. You are scheduled to be there for the next four hours, stay there."

Chakotay backed away from her icy glare. He took his seat on the bridge in silence. Folding his arms across his chest, he glared at the blank view screen for four hours without saying a word.

Harry watched as Tom and Chakotay racked up the pool balls for another game. They were 1-1 right now, this would be the deciding game. Whoever won this game would play the captain. With that knowledge, it should be an interesting game, Harry decided.

Tom wanted the chance to challenge the captain and win a tournament over her, which, considering how distracted she had been the past few days, it was very possible he could win. He smiled cockily at Chakotay. They were both good pool players, probably equal, but who wanted to win more?

Chakotay noticed Tom's grin. He would wipe the floor with that hot-shot pilot if it took every ounce of strength. His one desire was to win against Tom so he could have Janeway's attention for a little bit. Even if it was for only and hour, it was better than the way she was treating him now.

"Your break." Tom held a cue stick out to Chakotay.

Janeway watched in interest as the game began. First Tom was ahead, then Chakotay, then Tom, finally, only the eight ball was left.

Tom felt the captain's eyes on him, looking up he saw her watching from a table with B'Elanna. He grinned at them, and then aimed. The ball bounced off side walls before rolling to a stop about six inches away from the pocket.

Chakotay grinned. This would be the easiest shot in history. He called the pocket, aimed, and sunk it. Everyone began cheering for him, but he barely heard them. His eyes had located Kathryn slowly making her way to the table.

She stopped and eyed him for a moment. "Ready to lose, commander?"

"I'm sure you are." He grinned easily as he tossed her a cue stick, her favorite cue stick.

"Rack 'em up then." She drawled leaning against the table to watch as he set up the game.

"Ladies first, you break."

She aimed, and a sharp crack echoed throughout Sandrines as the cue ball hit the colored balls scattering them. Three dropped into pockets, two solids and one striped. Kathryn aimed at another solid ball, but it glanced off the side.

Chakotay grinned at her, and sank two before missing. He was ahead, she realized. It broke her concentration for a moment, but she quickly regained it and sank three in a row.

"Good come back." He smiled.

"Yes." She stated raising an eyebrow coldly at him.

Chakotay put his cue on the table, but was surprised to find it shaking under her intense glare.

B'Elanna noticed him shaking and turned to Tom. "What's wrong with them?" she asked.

"They've been at it for days now." Tom said softly to her, thankful that he had made up with B'Elanna. "I'm getting the feeling that pool isn't the only game being played here."

They continued to watch the two senior most officers. Janeway's glare, Chakotay's nervousness, then Chakotay would give her a look no one could interpret, but Janeway seemed to understand perfectly because suddenly she would miss a shot. This went on throughout the first game. Finally, Janeway won.

She smiled as the crew cheered for her.

"Nice job, Kat." Chakotay said low near her ear.

She glared at him coldly. "You break for the next game."

He was only too happy to comply, and sunk two of each colored ball. Eyeing the table, he chose the solids and aimed again. She chose that instant to move slightly closer to him, which undid his nerves. He watched helplessly as the cue ball ricocheted across the table without hitting anything.

Without meeting her eyes, he moved back to allow her room for her shot. He was right beside her, and as she bent over focusing on the table, Chakotay brushed her foot with his. She jumped, hit the cue ball and made it fly across the table. She hit several balls, but not in any particular order.

The crew members looked at her confused, no one had seen him rub her foot, but she turned angrily at Chakotay and glared at him. He smiled sweetly at her, "That's such a shame, Kat."

"Kat?" Tom asked with a smirk.

"Yes," Chakotay smiled. "She reminds me of a cat ready to pounce on her prey at any given opportunity." He was rewarded with another glare from the captain.

'Look who was doing the pouncing.' Her eyes clearly told him. He broke his eyes away from hers and set up his shot.

Rounding to the opposite side of the table, Janeway got down on her knees so her chin rested on the table. Then she stared at him.

Chakotay's palms grew sweaty. Those unmoving, unblinking, beautiful blue eyes staring at him were about to drive him insane- her exact goal. Taking in the layout of the whole table, he suddenly lifted the stick, aimed in the opposite direction, and hit the balls sinking one.

She rose from her knees and leaned against the side of the table. Chakotay rounded the corner and looked at her. She was purposefully right in his way.

The two eyed each other for a minute, then she moved back still holding his gaze. Something had to be done, she couldn't allow him to win the game with those tricks up his sleeves. Then an evil smile lit in her eyes. Everyone's eyes were on Chakotay's hands, no one would notice.....

She would do it! It'd serve him right after rubbing her foot. Folding her arms across her chest, Janeway moved to stand beside him. As he bent over for the shot, she let a lone fingernail, cunningly hidden by her arms, run down his side about two inches.

The captain was rewarded as her XO jumped and let out a gasp. The cue ball flew across the table, which was quickly becoming a mess of a game. "Kathryn!" He exclaimed. Everyone's eyes were on her.

"What?" She asked feigning innocence. There was a loud thunk as one of the solid balls fell in a pocket. Her jaw opened amazed.

"Thanks." He grinned. She glared at him again as he moved to attempt another shot. This time, he was fully expecting her to do something and his concentration was broken. He missed.

She confidently took up her place to aim. He was ahead by four, but there was still time to catch up. When he didn't do anything to her, she missed. Angry with herself, Janeway stepped back and allowed him to shoot. He finished the game then. All three balls and the eight ball were sunk in a matter of seconds.

The crew cheered, the next game would be a good one with both competing for what appeared to be more than winning the tournament. Chakotay set up the table and allowed her to shoot.

Her palms were sweaty and she was nervous, but at least she managed to get a ball in a pocket. They were over half way into the game before Chakotay did anything to unnerve her again.

She was aiming at the number 13 ball, when he leaned down beside her. "Kat, try for the fourteen, you've got a clearer shot for it."

She turned her head sharply and came face to face with him. Blue eyes met dark obsidian ones. She turned back to the table and looked. Yes, the fourteen was a clearer shot, but what advantage would that give him? Closer inspection revealed that it would give him no advantage. If nothing else, it would make it harder for him to shoot the three. She moved to the other side of the table and shot. It was an easy one, she quickly finished up that game before he was even given the opportunity to try again.

The crew cheered for her and she smiled at everyone. Turning to Chakotay she couldn't help her words. "What have you got to say now, Commander?"

He pretended to think about it for a moment. The crew waited expectantly for his answer. He met Kathryn's eyes, "Both." He said softly.

The color drained out of her face as she realized exactly to what he was referring to. How far had he been down the corridor when she had whispered that?, she thought frantically. Turning on her heel, she left the holodeck quickly.

Harry and the rest of the crew watched the captain leave, and then turned back to the commander.

"What kind of answer is that?" B'Elanna demanded.

"The one she didn't expect." Chakotay retorted cheerfully.

"What does it mean though?" She persisted.

He smiled secretively. "That's for me and the captain to know."

Harry stifled a yawn. "You two can fight this out, I'm going to bed." He told them.

"G'night." Tom pat his friend on the back.

Harry wandered to the turbolift and then from there into his quarters. He was exhausted. He had been scheduled for an early morning duty shift on the bridge and then B'Elanna had called him and said that they needed some help realigning the isolinear chips. What had been expected to take only and hour had turned into a five hour job.

Tumbling into bed, he was asleep almost instantly.

Harry walked onto the bridge and looked around quickly before moving to his station. Chakotay sat in the captain's chair, since Janeway was no where to be seen. After last night at the tournament, Harry doubted she would stay on the bridge very much. The tension between those two had mounted so much that the whole crew had known something was up before the pool games. Their behavior had only served to reinforce it.

The turbolift doors opened and Janeway strolled onto the bridge. She looked around also, but cast a cold glance at her first officer before taking the seat he vacated.

"Captain," Chakotay leaned over to her from his own seat. "May I have a word with you in your ready room?"

She turned to look at him with a slightly raised chin. "You do not need to speak with me in private, you can tell me here,...commander."

He looked around. Tuvok was watching them with more interest than a Vulcan usually showed, Tom had also turned from his station, as had Harry. "Are you sure?" he asked softly.

"Quite sure."

"Then in that case, I want to know exactly what was going on last night." His eyes bored into hers. "That was no ordinary game of pool and you know it."

She drew in a sharp breath. "This subject is closed." She stated turning back to the view screen.

"It is not. You did some things, and I want to know why."

Tom was nearly falling out of his chair, he was leaning over so much to hear the conversation. Janeway cast him a cold look before standing and walking swiftly to her ready room. Chakotay followed closely on her heels.

The instant the door closed she turned on him. "What right do you have to bring any of this up in the middle of the bridge??" she seethed at him.

"You were the one who forced me into that. You wouldn't come in here where I wanted to talk to you in the first place."

"When will you get it through your head, Chakotay?" she moved toward her window angrily. "We have nothing more than the captain/commander relationship."

"Last night you weren't treating me as a commander." He pointed out.

"Last night you started it by not treating me as a captain." Kathryn retorted.

Chakotay moved toward her. "You glaring at me the whole time was not helping the crew's opinions of our relationship. Nor did that little stunt you pulled tickling me, even if they didn't see it. If anything, it's sparked their interest."

"What the crew gossips about is not my concern." She backed away from him.

"But it is." He stated simply following her. "When the gossip isn't you, but instead us."

"There is no 'us', commander." Janeway said icily. "You seem to have a convenient way of forgetting that I have never had feelings toward you." She was against a wall, literally.

The dark, handsome XO stopped just in front of her. "I will not forget what I have seen in your eyes." He told her softly gazing into her bright blue eyes.

"You have seen nothing in my eyes." She tried to duck away, but he was quick to place both hands on the wall on either side of her.

"Haven't I?" Chakotay asked moving even closer.

She started to say something, but his lips quickly cut her off as he claimed her in a kiss. She froze for a minute, then her passion began to spill out as she returned the kiss. Arms encircled him, pulling herself closer. Encouraged, he crushed her to him in a tight embrace. All of a sudden, Janeway realized exactly what she was doing. With a slight cry, she pushed away and out of his arms.

"Commander, you have overstepped your boundaries." She told him breathlessly. "Get out."

"At least I know." He told her softly, and then he was gone.

Janeway sank into her desk chair and tried to calm her thumping heart and ragged breathing. Why did she let him have that affect on her? She raked a hand through her hair. Never again. Never, never again could she allow herself to break down like that with him.

Not one person on the bridge failed to miss how distracted Chakotay was when he exited the captain's ready room. His eyes, when not glued to the view screen, kept straying to the door of her ready room.

Tom was willing to bet a week's worth of replicator rations that something big had occurred in there, but he didn't know what. His curiosity was nearly driving him crazy.

"Commander, I am detecting an M-Class planet three light years from our current position." Tuvok announced from his station.

"Any lifesigns?" Chakotay asked after alerting the captain via his comm badge.

"Negative. Just vegetation."

"Set course then." Janeway said stepping onto the bridge. "We'll use this opportunity to restock Neelix's kitchen."

Two hours later Chakotay was preparing to lead an away team down to the planet's surface. He was transported into a large field with lush grass and flowers. A cool breeze blew ruffling his hair. The rest of the away team was also enjoying the atmosphere the planet created. If only Kathryn could see it, Chakotay thought to himself. He'd love a game of chase through the field with her..no! Stop thinking about her! He told himself.

"Ok, team. You know what to do. Just the usual collections." The team spread out and began searching.

Back on the ship, Janeway had been informed of how lovely the planet was. She gave the 'ok' for shoreleave without hesitation, and then on a whim, she decided to take some shoreleave for herself. Just a couple hours, she told herself, then I'll come back and work on reports. But once she transported down, Kathryn wasn't sure she'd be able to drag herself away.

Janeway set out hiking in the opposite direction of the away teams. The last thing she needed to do was run into Chakotay. The planet's plains were abruptly cut off as she reached a small river. Across the river a large hill rose out of the ground. She didn't have anything to cross with, and she sure wasn't about to swim across the river, so Kathryn headed upstream.

She hadn't walked for more than half an hour before noticing the huge thunderclouds that were swiftly accumulating in the sky. Turning back, she started a brisk walk back to the beam out sight. Not even halfway there, the rain began. Not a warm gentle rain, instead it was cold, beating against her skin. Within seconds, Janeway was soaked. She had reached the edge of the field just as the lightening began. Huge bolts of pink flashes came out of the sky. Dropping instantly to her knees she tapped her comm badge.

"Janeway to Voyager!" she shouted.

"Voyager here captain. Are you still on the planet?" Tuvok's voice came over the comm system.

"Yes. Has everyone beamed out?"

"No. We're not able to get a lock on the crew due to the storm. Lt. Paris has taken a shuttle into the atmosphere and is beaming the crew there."

"Understood. Janeway to Paris."

"Paris here captain, can you make it fast? I'm trying to get the crew off the planet."

"Keep working on it. Then see if you can get a lock on me."

"You need to move to the center of the field. That hill has some sort of mineral in it that's stopping us from getting a solid lock on you."

"Acknowledged. Janeway out." She stood up against her better judgment and began sprinting across the field to where she could see two people standing, one was Chakotay.

Just then the ensign with him disappeared in the blue transporter beam.

"Your turn captain." Chakotay said. "Paris, beam us up."

There was a pause. Then, "I only have enough energy left for one transport."

"Go Chakotay." She said.

"No."

"That's an order, Commander."

He raised his chin to her. "No."

"Are you disobeying a direct order?"

"It sure looks like it."

"Beam the commander up Paris, immediately!" Janeway shouted over the storm.

In the shuttle, Tom and Harry exchanged looks. "You better get them out of there." Harry said. "Sounds like they're going to kill each other."

"Kill each other? Naw.." he ran his hand up the console. "They may finally realize they're in love, but I doubt they'd kill each other."

Chakotay realized what she was doing and yanked off his comm badge. Before it had touched the ground it had dematerialized.

She turned to him. "Why did you do that?!"

Before he could answer, another hot pink flash seared the ground near them. "Let's continue this discussion somewhere else!" he shouted at her as he grabbed her hand and began pulling her toward the hill. B'Elanna had reported finding some caves there, if he could just find them....

Kathryn was suddenly wrenched from his grip. Chakotay spun to see what was wrong. She was laying on the ground, eyes closed.

"Kathryn!" he bent over her.

"I've hurt my ankle, Chakotay. Go on without me."

He moved to help her up.

"Go!" she shouted as another pink flash danced across the sky.

"No! It's time you quit giving me orders you know I won't follow!" he yelled back over the storm. She did her best to help herself up, then, leaning heavily on her XO, they continue rushing toward the hill. Plunging into the river she had sworn she wouldn't swim in, the two made it to the hill.

Chakotay shielded his eyes from the stinging rain and looked up and down the banks. There! About forty meters down stream! He could barely see the mouth of the caves through the rain. The couple started hobbling toward it when another pink bolt struck not ten feet from them. Both were thrown to the ground unconscience.

Chakotay was swimming through space. He was aware of the lightening striking around himself, and the rain pelting his skin. Then he remembered. Kathryn. She was here too. Groggily he forced his eyes open.

"Kat?" he whispered hoarsely. He turned over and saw her lying a meter from him. Pulling himself from the ground, knelt over her. "Kat? Please, wake up." He begged her, tears mingling with rain. Another bolt hit about twenty feet away from them. He jumped at the loud crack, and then gathering her in his arms, he began to race for the caves.

"Chakotay...." he heard her whisper. "Put me down....I can walk....."

When he didn't put her down, she woke. He was holding onto her tightly as he ran to the caves. She was so weak...didn't feel like fighting. Closing her eyes, she enjoyed the feel of his arms around her.

The next time she woke, darkness was around her. Rain was pounding outside, and thunder was reaching her ears. Chakotay? Where was he? Was he ok? "Chakotay?!" she sat up in panic.

"Shhh. Shhh. I'm right here." He was instantly beside her.

She grabbed the front of his uniform and pulled herself into his arms as sobs began to take over her. "The storm....my ankle..." she gasped out.

"I know. Shhh..It's all right now. I'm not going to let anything hurt you." He was holding onto her tightly, rocking back and forth.

She swallowed hard and buried her face in his chest. If anything had happened to him....no! She didn't want to think about it. She clutched him tighter.

He felt her arms clenching him. He liked the feel of her hugging him, if only it could be because she loved him though, then it would be perfect. He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he nearly missed her next words.

"Thank you Chakotay." Kathryn whispered.

He looked down at her. "What?"

"Thank you." She repeated bringing her eyes to meet his. "After all I've put you through this week, you still thought of my safety. Not everyone would do that."

Chakotay stared into her blue eyes. "I would do it for you a thousand times, Kat. You know that."

She didn't speak for a minute, just turned her face back into his chest. "I'm sorry." She finally whispered.

He pulled her back and looked down at her. Tears were streaming down her cheeks; he lifted a hand and wiped them away. "Kat.."

"No." She pulled her eyes to his. "I've treated you pretty awful this week, and I'm sorry. If anything had happened to you...." she trailed off staring at him. Then she gulped and plunged forward. "You wouldn't have known how I feel. Chakotay,..I.... love you."

Those few words made his heart soar. He closed his eyes against his own tears of joy and pulled her against him again. "I love you too, Kat." He whispered meeting her lips.

When they finally pulled back and stared into each other's eyes, pure love shone between them. Chakotay turned and looked toward the entrance to the cave. Rays of golden light were shining down. Taking Kathryn's hand, Chakotay supported her as they hobbled back to the beam out site.

The instant they materialized on Voyager, Tom saw something different with them. He was willing to bet a month's worth of replicator rations that more than a storm had transpired on the planet. If what he saw in their looks didn't confirm his suspicions, then the commander's reaching for his captain's hand and entwining their fingers as they exchanged a private smile did.